I can’t remember what my first painting was. I think I should but I really don’t and knowing me I probably painted over it anyways! I tend to do that. I know what my first painting class painting was, I look at it everyday as it sits on a ledge where it has been since I brought it home.
I have alot of paintings in my home that will never make it to the gallery. They are crude and raw and beautiful in their awfulness 😊 They are the proof of my evolution.
As I sit in my living room surrounded by my own art it overwhelms me- ” these are all mine”. I am lucky enough to say that some have moved on to hang on other peoples walls, one in B.C, another in Edinburgh and one in Sarnia and many on walls in Ottawa and Carleton Place.
When I started painting, I remember being afraid to show people what I had created. I was almost embarrassed by their simplicity. They were rough, crude, dark, heavy and I took it much too seriously. I had a very short list of who got to see what. I clearly remember talking to a good friend one day and admitting that I was afraid to throw out my unwanted canvas paper pieces because I was afraid what the garbage collectors would think. Seriously, WTF huh? Hahahaha!!! When I said it out loud, I realized how absurd it was and only then did I start to show some pieces. But from that day forward and with the help, support and encouragement of my posse I started to reveal what I was creating. I opened my Instagram account for that very reason. It’s a hard thing to do some days, to lay out the creativity that is flowing out of you, out there for people to see. Some days, I can’t. I’m too caught up in what people will say, how they will judge the piece and by extension, me. It always passes.
As I evolve in my art and creativity, I am up and I am down. I expect perfection at every sit at the easel and I have to remind myself that it is what it is; a journey, an evolution and a peeling away of the layers of creative doubt and insecurity to reveal the world as I see it. I am grateful for my posse, my peeps, the ones who support me on this journey and encourage my evolution. Onwards,

That painty feeling! Not for sale, display image only
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